Country of Origin.

Messy hair and sweaty faces aside, the last game was pretty motivating.
I wish I'll always have that fighting spirit but sad to say, things have been making me amotivated lately.

I realised that the world needs more real people,more love and faith, lesser human relationship complicationsand for individuals to stop thinking the world of themselves.

On a lighter note, I had a wonderful time catching up over youuu-mian, people-watching the suspicious characters, cracking silly jokes and imitating that funny guy whilst walking back home.

Hello world, currently the weather forecast in D's city is sunny and bright. Everything's good in the hood, yaw. Optimistic vibes are up and running.

So yesterday I worked with K and it felt so gooooood because he made me felt so comfortable. I don't know what it is exactly but there's just this aura to him that makes him seems so charming. Surprisingly I had so much fun, bonded with a couple of kids and made a new friend. And I'm the youngest in the company, I didn't even realised it until J pointed it out, hah.

Saturday's competition made my skin grow two shades darker. I can't believe it! I put on sun block, if sun block could be eaten I think I would have already downed it, and I made it a point to remain under the tent at all times only going out occasionally to play the matches but still, I got burnt =(

The competition made me see/feel what the seniors have felt thus I understand the rationale behind why they turned out the way they are. I never liked to join in the usual "politics" in a team but the longer you are in it, the deeper you get tangled and sooner or later you'll come to a point where you just can't avoid it. It applies everywhere, actually. Such. Is. Life.

On another note, I can't wait for later. Meeting the best friend for food and lepaks. Nothing beats seeing a familiar face after a hardcore weekend.

Woo-hoo, and the plus point of the day- there's no need to do powerpoint slides because I'm in the management team so our task is basically to delegate the work load and evaluate their work. Yayness.

Those with the blues, hang in there loves.
The day will be over soon :)

• I'm bleeding down under, like finallyyy
• Played against SAS (Singapore American School) just now
• Score stands at 6 -1 to RP, we won, yay
• Sick and very, very exhausted
• Peeved at some selfish bastards who only know how to shift blame on others
• Irresponsibility and NATO (no action, talk only)
• Country of Origin tomorrow, report at Turf City by 8 in the morning
• 2 parties on Sunday

That's what happened today and the plans over the weekends. I wonder how I'm going to survive considering the state I am in. Today made me see the ugly side to life and quite honestly, my patience's running low. Just because I rarely voiced out my dislike or how much I've tolerated your shits, that doesn't mean it's okay to keep stepping over. There are boundaries you should have never cross. If I had to say one thing I learnt today, it would be - being nice doesn't pay off.

Now I want to complete my RJ, pop some pills and comatose till tomorrow morning, all geared up for the competition.

Sunday, I had a last minute call back to work because one of the assistants couldn't make it to the party thus I had to replace her. I didn't regret it because the party was at Sentosa and I was assigned with E. She's adorably funny, I swear, especially when she starts sharing her life stories. I think I'm actually starting to like my job and the people! Good sign, really.

After the whole party ended, we cabbed back to the office and I separated to meet A over at Tampines for late lunch. We figured we were extremely free so we headed to the nearby mall and ended up getting stuffs for ourselves. It happened that B was having her break so we hung out with her for a little while. Great time spent with them. It would be perfect if G was there because it meant full force, haha. I miss us hanging out together, yaw. Quick, make plans!

Randomly brought lingerie and a dress. I swear boredom does no good to your pockets. We made a pact not to spend unnecessarily anymore and the loser who succumb to temptations shall treat the winner to a frappe. I hope I am able to last because money's rolling out faster than it's coming in and I have got bigger plans ahead of me that actually requires cash so I need to have sufficient funds first and well, of course I don't wanna lose to A please, heh heh heh.

Monday saw me heading over to D's place with G for dinner before making an impromptu plan to hit the gym! D had to lend me his shirt, shorts and shoes because I was nowhere near geared for gym, haha. It was a successful trip anyway with G and I doing steps and runs while D did his weights. I touched a little on my core muscles and boy, I feel awesome because I've been doing it for a few days regularly, yay.

Did I mentioned that D's mother is so hospitable? She kept reminding me to finish all the food and shoving food/fruit/sweets to us. I think if she was my mother, I would have been all chubby and plump but healthy =)

If I collected a dollar for everytime I faced the same sticky situation, I think I would have earned myself a bloody trip to Vernice already. You know I really wish I could speak to God right now so that he could help me make sense out of my life and tell me what are the choices to make. It makes things so much easier.

I have had a series of events happening just that I didn't pen it down because I couldn't get myself seated and write, no thanks to the shitload of unpleasant matters occurring both at home and in school. Quite honestly, I'm running out of drive to keep fighting. I constantly have to remind myself to be strong and to be there for the ones who care much just so I won't be beaten down by life but but but now all I want is to let me fall apart, be weak and have somebody take care of me for a change.

I suspect that my period is coming and my body's going through some hormonal change thus the rise of emotional triggers and shitty shitty bang bangs.

Adding on, I'm going to be real sick. My throat's so itchy!

Labels: hello pussy can you bleed already

So here's the big plan, I'mma attempt the test questions and if I happen to not know anything, I prolly gonna close the whole application and walk off.

I hate, hate, hate accounting just as much as I hate your guts.
Okay 5 more minutes to the ultimate suckfest.

I am so sleepy and I hate accounting. I've never figured why the hell we have to take a module on that when we are aspiring event-planners. I think life can get so cocked sometimes. Just like now, I wanna cry because accounting fucks my mind and as much as I want to flick a finger to it, I'm haunted by the daunting fact that I scored a D+ for the last test.

I think I'm too tired which is why I'm letting emotions run wild and I cannot summon any ounce of energy to try to contain them, hah. But I'm still in the mood to eat even though I just gobbled down a bowl of instant noodles.

Hmmmm. I reckon I'm gonna bleed real soon.

Sometimes all you need is just one person, to have your back, through whatever. One who will always assure you and allows you to make decisions that you may regret later. Not because she wants you to suffer, but because she knows that you'll feel better making that mistake, even only for a short while, and then learning from it. One who will still hear you out despite already having heard the same old story for the umpteenth time. And the one who gives you a dosage of reality when you are in need of one, not because she's mean but only because she genuinely cares for you =)

Kids can get so bratty and snobbish. I can't totally put the blame on them because they grew under such influences that incorporate values like superiority over others. I like to think that there's only so much a person can take. Everybody has their limits right and nobody should have to go there. I had mine tested last night and I swore if her mother wasn't the one paying for my services, I would have slapped her across the face.

Respect is a two way street, kiddos.

So I've been doing a lot of thinking besides keeping myself busy; working on the weekends, going for rugby every other weekdays and trying to meet the loved ones during the free days. You see, I think I was happier before I landed myself in this sticky situation and god knows how much I've been trying to pull away from it but it's so hard to tell your heart what to do and before you know it, you're back to square one. So here's what I do, I slogged myself out so badly that by the time nightfall comes, I'll be too exhausted to want to think. It's a bad habit and honestly I'm bearing severe consequences from it, but that's just how I roll.

The days in short:

• skipped school on Wednesday
• locked myself away from the prying eyes of the world and slept the whole day away
• resulted in a sprain in my right hand due to sleeping for long hours on it
• was a complete retard during training as well in school on Thursday because I couldn't move my arm, hah hah hah
• Kaffe Esplanade's couch, best friend for companion and a very familiar zone for comfort
• lurbzxz Rahil baby because she helped me make sense outta situations and got my back
• played the lousiest game ever against LFS on Friday, nyehh!

I started the day with an upbeat mood, with rainbows and butterflies. But happiness is fleeting, so they say. I hate how the mood just dived down low after school because of (insertsreasonhere). Sometimes it's always better to be ignorant afterall what you don't know won't hurt you.

Actually I don't know what I'm feeling. I've got mixed feelings.
All I want to do is sleep. Sleep life away, yah running back to my bed.
My favourite thang to do.

Gymming with B and Derrick after a boring day in schoool. First day back to school was so dready and so cheebye-ly sian with only 12 people in class. Ended class early and zoomed back home to get my gym stuffs.
Did running, leg presses, strengthing of the arms and a couple sets of exercise on the outer/inner thighs which is so bloody obscene. No kidding shitzx. I had to cover my vayjayjay with my towel, hohoho.

Maybe I should employ Derrick as my gym instructor aye because he's so disciplined while I lack in many areas. Hmmmmmm.

Proceeded to Pastamania after gym. So unhealthy! But because my friend here has the biggest crush on the guy there, she dragged us with her. Second time for me this week with her. At this rate, my pockets will suffer the most! Thus we, Derrick and me, decided that enough is enough and we set her up. Nothing much we did. We just went up to the guy, striked a conversation then got him to join us for a smoke and the rest of the story, I guess, is history.

I'm so tired but I feel good and youuuu, you make my heart flutter.
I think I'm going to bed with a smile tonight.

So this afternoon I was rushing like kaysiao because I needed to get to Geylang Lorong 24 by 2PM but I was still in Bedok at 1 50 frantically searching for a cab. Sometimes taxi(s) are so annoying. When you need one, there's none in sight but when you don't need one, there are like abundant of them. I finally hopped onto a cab by 1 55 and the driver was an old apek ah so I thought, "die liao ah, confirm drive slowly one".

We drove past Siglap and the traffic light was red. It was already 2 plus so I popped the question.

Me: "Uncle, how long more till we reach?"
Uncle: "Like from Siglap to now lor, why? What time you need to be there?"
Me: "Err, at 2. I late already ah"
Uncle: "Orh."

The light went green and the uncle just zoomed off, I was practically hanging onto whatever I could for dear life. He switches lane, going from left to right and right to left then speeded up, beating against any amber traffic lights yet remained calm and composed. The way he drove, wah, like F1 racer ah dawg. HAHAHA. This apek quite the champion. He's truly the classic example of "never judge a book by its cover".

Birthday party was at British Club. Dealing with 26 hyperactive kids is not funny. Met B and Ryoma after work. I just realised I've been seeing B for four days in a row. Record siol. We usually meet once/twice a month lor.
I lurb my bestfriendxzxz.

I got pictures but but but my bluetooth cannot work so cannot upload pictures into Sally.
Sally is my laptop by the way, heh.

okay I wanna take a crap now.

I don't get relationships and I prolly never will well unless my knight in shining whatever comes, sweeps me off my feets and catches me before I fall because then I would be falling heads over heels afterwhich I prolly would want to go through whatever you girls are going through: fighting shits and still staying strong for the name of love. Kudos to you who stood strong after so long because I doubt I ever will. Really. Cos I'm too much of pessimistic and sceptical.

I mean why would I wanna put myself through the pain, right?

Then R said this "you prolly haven't found the right man who makes you wanna do all these crazy things" which I think was absolutely accurate because 3 years ago I thought I had the perfect boyfriend until shit happens then we go through a very bad break-up and an even shittier closure.

Glad it's dunzo and we are happily busy with our own respective partner or partner(s), heh. Since then I never really gotten down to wanting to settle down because if you don't put yourself out there, people wouldn't get any close to hurting you. I'm very much a ditch-first-before-he-makes-his-move because yes people, I'm that much of a coward. The whole idea of me being brave and all, is actually bollocks.

And then there's this one guy who I really, really like and we are pretty cool and chummy like that but I don't think we are ever going to go beyond that. Even if there's a slightest chance of it, G told me not to because then we would lose the "magic".

See, so complicating right.

But I figured I'm too fly to be depressed so I'm gon do what I do best - buat bodoh.
HEEE.